Freakfaced Episode #06 - Meeting Seamus
Written by: CS-Yellow
Edited by: CS-Masyet
Everyone is sitting around in a circle, talking.Flippin': Fern, who flippin' knows? Do you flippin' know if you're going to get home safe?
Fern: No.
Flippin': Do you flippin' know if Junior's face will get better?
Fern: Er... no.
Flippin': Do you flippin' know if it's going to rain?
Fern: Yes. Looks up at the sky, which is pouring rain.
Flippin': Aw, flippin' geez! The point I'm trying to flippin' make is this; how do you flippin' know if you're magic or not?
Fern: Um... I guess I really don't...
Flippin': Exactly, flippin'!
Fern: But my family's not magic... At least I don't think so...
Sharp: I hate to rain on your parade, but...
Indigo: Ha! Rain on your parade! Get it? *giggle*
Sharp: Indigo!
Indigo: Sorry...
Sharp: Anyway, we'd better find a place to sleep tonight...
Indigo: Ha! Sleep! Get it? *giggle*
Sharp: Okay, now you're just being stupid...
Flippin': No worries, flippin'! My cousin Seamus flippin' lives just outside the flippin' forest! I bet we can reach him by flippin' evening! Follow flippin' me. Everyone runs down a path deeper into the forest. When they nearly reach the end, they find a small house. By now it's evening. There it is! Knocks on the door.
Seamus: Who is it now? *groan* Shame, shame. Oh, it's you! Cousin, long time no see. Shame, shame. Do come in. Who are your friends? Flippin' introduces Seamus to everyone and they all go inside his warm hut.
Flippin': Flippin' thanks, Seamus!
Seamus: No problem. Shame, shame... Starts a fire in his fireplace and brings them a tray of cocoa. Hope your clothes dry soon. I have some cots for ya'll to sleep in, shame. Points to Junior. Why do you have a bag over your face; shame, shame?
Junior: An evil witch named Linus cast a spell on me. Now my face is all ugly and discontorted. We've come here to WizVille to find some items that will unlock the spell.
Seamus: Oh, what a shame. Shakes head. Shame, shame... Gets a closer look at Indigo. Are you... no. No, you couldn't be...
Indigo: I'm Indigo, princess of the Witch World.
Seamus: Wow... I can't be seeing this. And you? Points to Fern. I've seen you before, haven't I?
Fern: You couldn't have. I'm just Fern. And I've never been here before, so...
Seamus: No, no. I've seen you around here before. Only last time I saw you, you were taller. Much taller.
Fern: But that can't be!
Seamus: Shame, shame. The poor girl don't remember where she was last.
Fern: I do remember where I was last! I was at the Happiness Inn and the Transportation Station!
Seamus: Does this one have mental issues, Flippin'?
Flippin': No, she's a very flippin' clever one, Seamus.
Fern (angry): I don't have mental issues! And stop confusing me! I think you're the one with mental issues!
Seamus: Shame, shame; you must be... But you're supposed to be dead...
Fern: I'm not dead! What are you talking about? (I really hate this guy...) I'm perfectly alive, thank you very much! Seamus doesn't have time to answer, because a small girl around seven runs down the stairs.
Girl: DADDY!!!
Seamus: Oh, hello Angie!
Angie: Daddy, I'm hungry and I want dinner and if you won't give it to me then I'll get mad and if I get mad then you'll be really sorry...
Seamus: Don't worry, little Angie. Everyone, this is my daughter Angie. Shame, shame.
Angie: Stop saying that and get me my dinner or I'll go get the strolling guys in the woods to come mash you to a pulp and I mean it, Daddy!
Seamus: Okay, sweetums. Starts dinner. Cousin, can you roll out the cots upstairs and get the pillows so that they'll be ready for bedtime? Shame.
Flippin': Flippin' yes, cousin! Goes upstairs.
Angie: Daddy, I want my dinner now! And I mean now, now, now, now, now!
Seamus: I'm sorry, sweetums. Daddy's cooking the fastest I can.
Angie: Well, you aren't cooking fast enough! When Mommy gets home she'll punish you so bad that when I walk to school I'll see your body hanging from the gallows!
Sharp: (I don't think she knows what "gallows" means...)
Seamus: Tell you what, dear. To make it up to you I'll go to the store and buy you a nice sapphire necklace, a big block of sapphire. Right after dinner. Shame, shame.
Angie: No, no, no! I want a whole block of sapphire and a solid gold chain so you can make the necklace and I can tell you exactly what it looks like, okay?
Seamus: Sounds like a deal. Finishes dinner and passes it out at the table. When dinner is over, he goes out to get the supplies for the necklace.
Fern: Did you hear that, Sharp? A block of sapphire is one of the things we need!
Sharp: I know, but we can't just take it from them.
Fern: Why not?
Sharp: Because it's stealing!
Fern: So? Seamus was mean to me!
Sharp: True, but...
Seamus: I'm back! Puts his things on the table. Gosh, it's late. Shame, shame... Well, up to bed, everyone!
Angie: But, Daddy! It's early and besides you didn't even make the necklace and I want it tomorrow so when school starts everyone will be jealous of my new necklace and I deserve to go to bed as late as I want because I'll be the new princess of WizVille soon!
Seamus: No darling, up to bed. Princesses need their beauty sleep. Shame, shame.
Angie: Well, I guess you're right....
The next morning...Flippin': Thanks for letting us flippin' stay here, Seamus.
Seamus: It's no problem, cousin. Shame, shame!
Flippin': We'll get flippin' going now. Flippin'. Fern! Sharp! Indigo! Junior! It's time to flippin' go! They all exit the house. As Fern walks through the door, Seamus pulls her back by her shirt.
Seamus: Fern, was it? May I ask you something? What's your last name?
Fern: Johnston, why?
Seamus: Oh, so it's not you that I killed. Shame, shame.
Fern: What are you talking about?!?
Seamus: You so much like your mother, I got you two confused. Shame, shame...
Fern (angry): Y-you... You killed her?!?
Seamus: Of course; she was next to the throne. So are you, so you'd better be careful...
Fern: Punches Seamus in the face so hard he stumbles to the ground, then grabs the block of sapphire and runs through the door to catch up with her friends. Guys! Guys! Seamus killed my mother and now he wants me dead!
Flippin': Why would he want to flippin' kill you? He's my flippin' cousin! Seamus wouldn't do a flippin' thing like that!
Fern: He said I my mother was next to the throne, and me after!
Sharp: Wait, you're wizard royalty? But how?
Fern: I-I don't know... I'm not a wizard...
Flippin': You sure about that, flippin'?
To Be Continued...